I only got myself to blame
by RJCH
Summary: Tamar get send to Horizon. Don't really know yet how the story works out so just read it.


_A/N Okay this is the deal, I start writing this a day or two ago when I was extremely bored. I know my English sucks so no need to tell me I have mistake and bla bla bla. If you guys like the story I will continue, so let me know. _

Don't own all original characters, as far as the in there.

**I only got myself to blame.**

I woke up with a major headache, his strong arm around me. I carefully turned around looking at his face, he was still sleeping, his deep ocean blue eyes closed, his sandy blond hair messed up. This was they only guy I knew would love me till the end of the world and back and I loved him equally as much. I softly touched his face, causing him to wake up. He smiled and with a croaky voice he said "Good morning sunshine." This where the first words he always said to me in the morning. He was predictable and it made me feel safe. My live was always full uncertainties but with Dave I always knew want I got.

"You are gonna be late" Dave said to me after he took a look on his alarm clock. I just nodded I knew I was gonna be late, I rolled out of bed and started to get dressed, Dave did the same. I stopped and looked in the mirror looking at the scar on my stomach, following the line with my finger. "I miss him too" Dave turned me around making me look in his beautiful eyes. "It wasn't your fault" I could see the pain in his eyes and turned my head away. "It was" I said barley out loud. We both continued to dress.

"You need a ride?" I smiled "Better not, Nick would probable sue your ass for sleeping with his underage granddaughter." He smiled he knew I was right, no one was to know about there relationship. Dave was six years older then me, the fist time we met was already years ago but it instantly clicked. I looked at him, it was hard to say goodbye, we knew we weren't gonna to see each other for a long time. "I gotta go" He nodded "I'm gonna miss you" I looked down "Yeah I'll call you" With that I left the love of my live. There was no need for long goodbyes they said goodbye last night. I felt like crying but didn't I just rushed to my grandparents house.

My grandmother Sallie was the most wonderful person there was. She was a sweet, caring person who cared more about others wellbeing then her own. I promised her to go back to school, the last four or five years I didn't, after my dad died, my mom had to work her ass of to provide for me and my sister Hadassah, who I took care of, because my mom was never around. Later on I got pregnant and had to take care of the baby to, my mom disappeared shortly after that. For almost three more years I provide for my family, with the help of Dave, he was a poor med student who lived next to us. He was also the one how got me knocked up. When social service found out about it, they thought Nadav, my son, was my brother, they contacted my fathers parents, who I hadn't seen since the funeral. After that, things got pretty bad. Sallie was mothering over the three of us, what was well mend, but to late for it. Maybe if we got to live there sooner, it would have been easier. Me and Nick, my grandfather, was a hole other story we fought just as long about everything till I couldn't take it anymore. One night I pack my stuff and I took Hadassah and Nadav with me and left with Nick's car. There was an accident, that killed Hadassah and Nadav. After that things between Nick and me got only worse.

I stopped before the steps before my grandparents house, I didn't want to go in there, I couldn't handle seeing Nick right now. I slowly opened the door hoping that Sallie would be in the kitchen. I guess luck wasn't on my side because I ran right into Nick, who was pretty pissed because I didn't came home last night. "Where have you been?" His low voice went right through me. I knew that if I didn't answer him soon enough he would slam me across the face to make me answer. He grasped my shoulders making me look at him, I turned my head away. But looked when he demanded to. I still didn't say anything and I knew he was going to slam me, and braced for it, when the doorbell rang. "Listen young Lady, you took my son away from me, killed my grandkids, even made your mother leave you, I'll remember you about that as long as I live, you can't run away from me" "I can end your live, I'm getting pretty good at that" I didn't mean to say that, stupid the next thing I knew his hand landed in my face. Then he opened the door, like nothing happened he friendly spoke to the men by the door.

Sallie walked down walked down the stairs, she must have just finished packing my stuff. "Hey Honey, I glad you came" I smiled, how couldn't I, I didn't want to let her down. She softly touched my red face. "don't keep it against him, he is just hurting" I forced a small smile "I know" Beside he was right it was al my fault, I couldn't blame him for being angry with me.

The trip to the school seemed to take forever, Nick was driving me. Sallie couldn't sit to long in a car so we said goodbye at the house. It was starting to get dark when I saw the sign Mount Horizon High School 3 miles. The closer we got the more reluctant I felt, I didn't want to go. The only reason I agreed with my grandmother was that she put a lot of effort to get her in and I didn't really had the choice to go to an other school. On the bright side I wasn't going to ran into Nick all the time. I looked at Nick sitting in the drivers seat, I was surprised that he really driving me up her, knowing how much he was against to sending me here. The only reason for him to do it was basically the same as mine.

Nick got out of the car after he parked to car on the driveway, a men walked out of the Admin Building and greeted Nick. I watched them still sitting in the car, I really didn't want to go anymore. I knew it was childish but I locked the doors when Nick walked the car to order me out. Nick started to knock on the window of his precious car, trying to suppress his boiling angry. I putt my hand on my hears blocking his voice out of my head, I needed to think, find a way out of here. I looked up and saw my escape, Nick left the keys in the car. Dome move Nicky I thought as I made my way to the frond seat. "Oh no, don't you dare young Lady" I heard Nick say, but ignored it. The guy Nick had been talking to now also started to talk into me to come out, but I didn't listen. Before I knew I was driving away leaving a pissed of Nick behind.

I needed to get away from here, I needed to talked to Dave, he was the only one that would understand, I couldn't without him. I shouldn't never agree to go here. My head was spinning to much to pay attention on the street. I got torn out of my thoughts, by a siren behind me and started to panic when I realized they had to have me. "Okay this sucks" As if thing couldn't get worse it started to rain. Now I was never a skilled driver, hell I never passed my driving test. The police car passed me, out of shock I pulled the wheel, losing complete control of the car. The car tumbled around a couple of times before it stopped up side down. My shoulder was hurting pretty bad, and I had the feeling that the world was spinning a little faster than usually. Anyhow I manage to crawl out of the car and sat down a about 10 feet from the total crashed car. Nick was never going to forgive her for crashing his car, a second time.

Guess driving is just not my thing, I though my memories drawn to that horrible day a few months ago. I didn't remember exactly, it was all a little hazy but I couldn't get the image of Hadassah and Nadav out of my mind stuck in the car, sirens, police, paramedics. My head started to toll. A hand was placed on my shoulder and I came back to the reality of now.

I quietly listen to Nick how was preaching endlessly, about how stupid I was how he was lucky that I got be locked away and on and on. In the mean time the doctor was fixing me up, my shoulder was dislocated, and the doctor was putting me through greet pain to get it back in place. It must have been on my face how much it was hurting that Nick more or pushed the doctor aside and pulled in one swift everything back in place. Nick was Chef of Staff in the local privet hospital.He looked at the doc, next time practice on someone else, and give her something for the pain.He looked at me "Get some sleep" with that he left the room.

I rubbed my sore head, I was surprised I felt a sleep. "That wasn't such a smart thing to do, now was it?" I quickly wanted to sit up more or less expecting that Dave would hold me back. But when I was up and my head was tolling I realized that Dave wasn't here. "How are you feeling?" I looked at the guy that Nick talked to earlier at the school. I touched my shoulder, my arm was in a sling and it was quite painful. "Where is Nick" I asked not sure why."Who?" I closed my eyes, I should have know he never introduced himself as Nick. "The great doctor, not so great grandfather Nickolai Lent" "Your grandfather left some time ago" I tried not to look to relieved, but knew he was on the me. "You and your grandfather aren't close?"

This guy however he was, was sure nosy. "Do I know you?" I asked annoyed by his questions. "Peter Scarbrow, director of Mount Horizon" I looked at him. "I guess that I'm not gonna get out of this, right" He looked at me, probably trying to figure me out. "I thought you agreed of coming here?" I didn't answered, wondering how I get into this mess, I knew how a better question would be how to get out.

_A/N Okay this is what I have so far, let me know if you like it...__Oh the main characters name is Tamar (I know is not mention in the story line yet.) _


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